didnt make it for xiang's POP haix cox my fainting spell hit me while i was on the train was going to redhill to get camera from dear's bro the train was going towards commonwealth when that feeling came over me i recognized it at once its a old ailment that had relapse ever other time in my life since young cox either by hunger or sudden dip in blood pressure i was like "Oh SHIT" planned to alight on commonwealth but didnt make it in time. all the time i dun faint immediately never did, not even once but thats the agony its better that u got knock out cold den u feel sick all over and vision got clouded by burst of colours colours that blinds u. i barely manage an excuse me and reach the door when i cant see wads in front anymore and cant make my way out my instinct is to squat down when i felt better it was an old trick but it only serves it purpose for a while nearing redhill i stood up tinking that i felt better enough to exit but i was wrong this time it came faster the door open but i cant see anymore i was afraid of the gap between the platform and the door i was afraid that i will step into it but i have to exit at least redhill is near dear's house blinded i took huge step knock into some ppl and made it safely out of the door i was in cold sweat, cause by the ailment and my fears i barely made it out of the station i bought some bread from the nearby bakery hoping that eating a bit will make me feel better took 1 bite and i cant eat anymore collapse onto the staircase leading to the station i hugged my bag and try to find ways to make myself comfortable but in vain i was dripping with sweat my blood runs cold i wish for dear to be there but he cant cox he is working this time round i face it alone
now that i had written all this down i wonder why no one came up to ask me if i needed help where's the kindness that one's suppose to have? wad had become of us humans? questions that do not need answers
esther came to meet me at redhill station she didnt want to go alone and i felt bad cox i cant go and i am afraid it will come again she accompany me for a while afterwhich we parted and i left for dear's house
sorry xiang cox i noe POP is ur once in a lifetime but i cant be there thanx esther for coming down to show her care :)
sometimes when i stood by the window and look down to other people i wished that i could stand there forever and let time wash over me i dun need time to slow down for me i jux want to slow down my pace of life and find new things to enjoy - me *imissyou* |